i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
Randomize
