Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
