I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize