dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?