dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
So here I am, sexting at work.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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