I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Randomize
