I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
