Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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