He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
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