we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
We had to coat check the pizza.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
