SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
