I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize
