Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
