...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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