Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Randomize
