her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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