I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
