If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
that may or may not have been my penis.
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