Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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