Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You smell like a Billy Joel song
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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