Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
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