who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
she peed on how many people?
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Randomize