I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
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