i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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