he puts the penis in happiness.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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