Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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