hotel room ftw
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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