I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
