By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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