She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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