I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
