dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Two ladies just showed up with my fucking purse. It was in the fucking street. I'm a train wreck. As a financial advisor, this shouldn't happen. I should be an adult.
I have bruises all over my body. Seriously, I'm a train wreck. I'm too damn old for hangovers like this.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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