The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
