Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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