I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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