Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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