did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
