yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
