i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
