I can tuck mytits in my pants
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
