he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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