so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
do herpes really smell.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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