I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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