When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again