Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
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