I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I think people are normalizing furries
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize