somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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