I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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