I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
