My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
