She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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