you're like a bully in the Christmas story
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize
