i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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